So pecos bill

he’s lived a long life
full of random cowmurder
and tornado-induced terraforming
and probably
more than his fair share
of bestiality
but then one day he dies
the end

oh wait do you want to know how he dies
well ok basically
he is hanging out in New Mexico
and this dude comes from Boston
swaggering all the fuck around everywhere
like I AM A COWBOY GUYSZZZ
so he buys himself a ten gallon hat
and some spurs
and a six-shooter
and like a lasso
and maybe one of those tin sherrif stars
and like
some chewing tobacco
and some leather chaps
with like fringes on them
and some bullets for his gun
and basically just a neverending truckload
of cowboy accessory bullshit

so pecos bill watches this guy
doing what he is doing
and he is so incredibly amused
that he just lies down
and laughs himself to death
he busts a gut
he busts all the guts

so i guess the moral of the story is
if you are trying to kill a tough as nails cowboy
and nothing seems to work
try comedy

the end