Hey so as promised here is a video about jesus
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
COMING UP NEXT: THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT
JESUS CHRIST, JESUS CHRIST
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Category Archives: Video
THE DREAM QUEST OF UNKNOWN KADATH would be a good alternate title for Johnny Quest
so it turns out this book is a full 100 pages shorter than I thought it was
don’t ask me how that works
perhaps my book is a wizard
the point is I never want to see the word “antediluvian” in print ever again
Holy shit I love this hat so much
it’s really comfortable and it has SKULLS and FIRE
I love you skulls and explosions lady
THE DREAM QUEST OF UNKNOWN KADATH is pretty (PART 2!)
The promoted video that displayed when I watched this video
was called “Bottom Exercises”
I guess those are important
maybe you should do some while you watch this video?
I keep forgetting I’m wearing this hat
and then i go outside and people are like NICE HAT
and I’m like EXPLOSIONS
THE DREAM QUEST OF UNKNOWN KADATH is a pretty long name for a book
Alright guys
some wealthy benefactors
just dug their fat jeweled hands into their immense moneypouches
and produced enough glittering gold coins to persuade me to do THIS LOVECRAFT STORY
it’s gonna be great
i finally get to use this skulls and explosions hat
also this brand new invisible shirt
i originally wrote moneypouches as moneypunches
One time i played a Bible-themed rhythm game. It was called Para Para Paradise Lost
Oh hey guys i forgot to tell you i got into grad school
you can stop saying nice things about me on here now
anyway here’s a video that shows why i deserve to be in grad school
Also
all future shirt sales go towards the “DIG ME THE FUCK OUT OF STUDENT DEBT” fund
I have completely run out of clever titles for my Paradise Lost videos
So here’s a video and you’re just going to have to deal with it
PS BUY CROSSDRESSING SHIRTS!
When Paradise loses its keys, it is like trying to find a needle in a cluster of fucks
So up until this point
I was really not enjoying Paradise Lost
BUT JOHN MILTON DISCOVERED MY ONLY WEAKNESS:
OLDE TIMEY FOLKS TALKIN BOUT SEX
HERE WE GOOOOOOOO:
DO YOU HAVE A BONER NOW
BECAUSE IF SO
I NEED YOU TO POINT IT AWAY FROM YOUR COMPUTER SCREEN
IT IS MAKING ME UNCOMFORTABLE
When it comes to Paradise, Fucks come in Clusters
JUST KIDDING HERE IS SOME MORE GLEEFUL BLASPHEMY
Although actually
does it count as blasphemy
when what i am blaspheming
is some other dude’s apocryphal nonsense book?
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Paradise was probably Lost because of Clusterfucks
I was going to type something
but then it turned into 4AM
and via the magic alchemy of sleep deprivation
I now have NOTHING TO SAY
ENJOY
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Paradise Lost Is a Clusterfuck
Okay so quick disclaimer
I know you all want to see my sweet new skulls and explosions hat
but some asshole stole it from me at a party in San Francisco
BUT
one of my friends in Oakland GOT IT BACK FOR ME
THAT’LL TEACH YOU TO WEAR MY POSSESSIONS TO THE PARTIES YOU STOLE THEM FROM
FUCKER
and so it is in the mail right now
but in the meantime you are going to have to deal with this hat:
DEAL WITH IT
DEAL WITH IT